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AV Dojo | 12/20/23 Recap and Notes
During our mat work at the dojo, @Dunamis called up some brave volunteers and took away their perceived strength by tying hands, feet, or blindfolding eyes. Then he assigned them tasks to see what they would do. The way people responded was revelatory.
The content portion was based on the [4] Growth by Doing quad — a paradigm for learning skills in the context of relationship and community. It’s an “apprenticing” form of learning. We discussed how transformative this pattern of learning could be, how much it would have effected us had it been available, and why it’s rare for leaders to practice this level of investment. It was also pointed out that many of us have already begun to do this in our parenting — especially in a “slow cycle” way: over the larger arches of our children’s development. One of our members said, “This was the whole idea of a village, right? Where are the elders? We really need some elders.”
Our work portion was in small groups and we practiced the [4] Growth by Doing quad by modeling and practicing our group facilitation skills. The topic was what we dream for the child-focused spaces in Awaken Village.
Our wrap focused on how we were using [1] Mercy Space to focus on the first space in the quad of our children’s space project. We contemplated Luke 10:1-4:
Now after these things, the Lord also appointed seventy others, and sent them two by two ahead of him into every city and place where he was about to come. 2 Then he said to them, “The harvest is indeed plentiful, but the laborers are few. Pray therefore to the Lord of the harvest, that he may send out laborers into his harvest. 3 Go your ways. Behold, I send you out as lambs among wolves. 4 Carry no purse, nor wallet, nor sandals. Greet no one on the way.
Here’s the important points:
- “lambs among wolves” meant that he was sending them out in this preparatory mission from a position of vulnerability.
- “no purse, nor wallet” meant they had to rely on the generosity of others and each act of generosity open room for a new relationship.
- “nor sandals” meant they could only travel a short distance, opening up frequent connection with others.
- “greet no one on the way” meant they wouldn’t fall under the hospitality obligation of their culture to people they befriend on the way which would have excluded them from new relationships in each town.
This story illustrates the importance of vulnerability in creating space (context) for connecting with the full humanity of others. This isn’t a vulnerability of weakness and insecurity, but rather one that comes from faith and confidence that allows us to make room for others in a way that doesn’t loose ourselves. This is the secret to drawing the authentic humanity of others to the surface, whether they be children, peers, or fellow change-agents.
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One of our members requested a poster-sized version of the [4] Human Growth quad. Here’s a link to a PDF version that you can print at Staples or similar office store on 24×36″ architectural print paper: https://unusualkingdom.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/12/4-human_growth_poster_plusquads-3.0.20231222.pdf
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Afterward, this same member (who needs to create an account with a username so I can quite referring to him as “member”) and I had a great conversation about vulnerability from strength in creating [1] Mercy Space. We talked about how bullies can’t respect anyone because they can’t be vulnerable since they are insecure — their trauma had made them unable to do anything but assert themselves in the most crude, violent, and coercive ways. Another person — properly secure, may actually be more physically powerful than the bully — but is able to show respect to even the weakest nerd because they have the confidence to be vulnerable.
We talked about how [1] Mercy Space is also applicable to the sales process. When we make room through secure vulnerability-from-strength, we have power to actually hear clients and they can tell we’re most interested in hearing and helping them with their interests regardless of sales. This is especially important if we are selling trust or service as a premium over cheaper products that are not as good for customers or the world.
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